


Don't Go

by EnchantedApril



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-19
Updated: 2016-03-22
Packaged: 2018-05-27 16:32:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6291841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EnchantedApril/pseuds/EnchantedApril
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Non has taken the woman who killed his wife.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I absolutely love how they went about the "Alex killed Astra" revelation, but before that, I'd had a different scenario bouncing around in my head. It wouldn't leave me alone, so I wrote it down.

Don't Go

CHAPTER ONE

Of course Non had picked a place far from National City. A cliff overlooking a deep ravine, far out in the desert. Kara's jaw tightened as she silently wondered if all secret forces - both good and evil - chose the desert for their lairs and if so, why didn't they ever stumble upon one another. She put on another burst of speed as she saw figures and some sort of structure come into view.

She had only known of Alex's abduction for ten minutes, but they were ten eternal minutes to her, especially when she wasn't precisely sure when Alex had actually been taken. At first Hank hadn't even believed that she was missing, thinking that Alex had just gone off for a while by herself, as she did more often now, the guilt of killing Astra weighing heavily on her. One look at her apartment had changed his mind and he'd set the DEO on to tracking her. It was easy enough since all agents had been implanted with digital chips after his own kidnapping.

Kara had refused to wait for a team to be assembled and had flown off at Mach 2 towards the tiny blip she had seen on the tracking map. But now she didn't need the memory of that map. She knew where to find Alex by the sound of her screams.

She pushed herself ever faster, heart pounding within her chest for the first time while flying. She had to get there in time. She couldn't lose anyone else. She couldn't lose her sister. 

She landed with less grace than usual, the force cracking the dry ground and sending a shockwave through the area. Instantly all of the Kryptonian soldiers were on alert and poised to attack. She glared at them all, her eyes settling finally upon Non. She didn't let herself look at Alex for more than a moment but she saw that her sister was attached to some sort of machine, legs and arms encircled in metal, with a wide metal belt around her waist.

Non held up a hand and the soldiers relaxed while Kara continued to stare him down.

"Well, well, dear niece."

"I am not your niece! You are no family to me!" Kara shouted at him.

"Just as you say," Non replied. "I use the term only to honor your aunt. She placed too much weight in the bonds of family."

He turned towards the structure holding Alex and Kara was forced to follow his gaze, taking in every scratch and bruise on the other woman's face, and the way she was breathing heavily, head lolling but eyes still defiant. She had obviously fought hard when she was taken and was still fighting now.

"Do you recognize this device?" He asked as he stroked the controls which led to the contraption currently holding Alex.

It was a large pedestal with an arch above it and a wide pole standing in the center. It was that pole which Alex was chained to, with streaking blue lights running along the edge of the arch and down the pole into the base.

"It's something out of the history books," he answered his own question. "A machine designed to carry out corporal punishment for the highest crimes on Krypton. Naturally it was done away with once the High Council deemed it to be too barbaric. It seems fitting to bring it back into use here on this primitive planet. These controls can do anything from sending her tremendous pain to completely stopping her heart. You may have heard her when I was testing some of the lower settings," he finished with a horribly smug tone and a hateful look on his face.

Kara was clenching and unclenching her hands, trying not to shake as she listened to Non and heard what had already caused Alex some unknown amount of pain. It had taken her ten minutes to arrive, but how long had Alex been there? How long had Non been "testing"? She couldn't bear to think about it.

"I didn't come here to talk, Non. I came here to take back my sister, and if I have to kill you to do that, I won't shed a tear."

"Your sister now, is she?" Non said, and the touch of glee in his voice sent a shiver down Kara's spine. His voice hardened and he spat out, "Your sister is a murderer who is here to serve her sentence!"

"Murderer? There was no murder committed, Non. You and Astra are the ones who said that lives lost in war are necessary, or don't you remember?"

Kara chanced a look at Alex and saw the pleading and fearful look on her face. At first she assumed it to be directed at Non, but then their eyes met and she realized that Alex was silently pleading with her.

"Kara, I'm sorry," she managed to say in a voice rough from overuse, but she could say nothing else because Non suddenly turned on the machine and the racing lights turned red and orange and yellow as power seemed to surge through the young woman's body, forcing her muscles into rigor and pulling a scream from her lungs.

"Stop! STOP IT!" Kara screamed, taking a step towards Non just as he cut the power, allowing Alex to sag against her bonds.

"She murdered my WIFE!" He shouted. "Eventually I will turn this up to the highest setting and watch her die, but at the moment I am enjoying her pain. And after her, it will be your turn, Kara Zor-El."

 

Kara wanted to rush at Non and throttle him, but he was too close to the controls and she was too afraid that he would be faster than her and turn the machine on to a deadly level. She clenched her fists repeatedly, trying to rein in her growing rage.

"You know I'm not going to let you do this," she said tightly, voice dangerously calm.

"And yet, there is nothing you can do about it," Non replied, equally calm as he turned the machine on again and Alex let out an inhuman shriek as her body tensed and then a sharp snapping sound was heard.

Kara was screaming along with her sister when Non shut the current off.

"Interesting," he commented. "Apparently human bones cannot withstand the forces of their own muscles being contracted. He looked directly at Kara. "How long, do you suppose, would it take for each of her major bones to break?"

"Stop this!" Kara was shouting again and staring only at Non, though she could still hear Alex's labored breathing and small sounds of pain as if she was holding her in her arms.

"I will give you a choice, Kara Zor-El. You may leave now. I realize that isn't exactly the honorable thing to do, but it you would not have to see this human's suffering and you might even make it far enough that you survive for another day before I kill you."

"Kara... Go..." Alex whispered her plea and Kara spun to look at her with incredulity. As if she could possibly leave her sister just to avoid pain or even death.

"I'm not going anywhere, Non," she answered firmly. "And I am not letting you do this."

Non moved then, with a burst of speed which Kara wasn't expecting, and he was almost instantly behind her, with a blade pressed between her lower ribs.

"Do you know what this is, dear niece? A Kryptonian blade. Not exactly the sword which this disgusting human used to kill my wife, but deadly just the same. I was going to make you watch her die, but now I am beginning to think that I would rather torture her further by letting her see the life draining from your eyes."

"Please, Kara..." Alex was imploring her with her words and glassy eyes, begging her to break free and escape.

But Kara could not lose her sister. Not today. Not ever.

If Non had moved quickly, Kara was merely a blur of kinetic energy as she forced her body back into his, pushing the blade into herself as she did so, but throwing him off balance in a way she knew she couldn't have accomplished with the kryptonite already weakening her just by its proximity.

He shouted in rage at the same time Alex screamed her name, but Kara barely heard either of them. She tore herself from Non's grasp and then reached behind, with a last burst of super speed and strength, and ripped the knife from her flesh, spinning sharply on her heel and plunging it directly into Non's throat.

The shocked and outraged expression on his face was quickly suffused by pain and then nothing as his breath came in short gurgling spurts and he slumped to the ground.

Almost instantly, his troops had moved in, but the DEO had also arrived at last, and the threat of more kryptonite weapons and dozens of black-clad operatives, together with the death of their leader, was enough to make them scatter to the sky. Kara was breathing heavily, back throbbing with pain and vision growing spotty, but she moved to Alex's side, near frantic when she saw that the other woman was no longer conscious. A button at the back of the pole caused the restraints to release and she caught her sister as she slumped to the ground herself.

"Alex? Alex!" Kara shouted as she shifted herself around so that her sister's head was resting on her lap. "C'mon... You're the tough one, Alex," she continued, pleading for the other woman to open her eyes.

The slight twitch would not have been felt by a human, but Kara felt it, and patted Alex's cheek again, willing her to open her eyes.

"Kara?" The name was little more than a groan, spoken while Alex's eyes were still shut.

"I'm here, Alex. I'm right here and Non isn't going to hurt you or anyone else."

"Kara?" Brown eyes finally opened, but they were fogged with pain and confusion.

"I'm here," Kara was crying now, unsure what to do to fix her sister. "Please don't leave me alone here."

"Forgive me?" was all that Alex said as she met Kara's gaze and held it. "I'm so sorry. I didn't want to..."

Kara shook her head vehemently. "Alex, shhhhh. Stop. I forgave you the night that it happened. Don't think about that. Please, just stay calm and stay with me."

"But you've been so mad at J'onn, and you never said anything..." Alex was clearly struggling to remain awake but seemed desperate for absolution.

"I was mad because you both lied to me. C'mon, Alex," she tried to joke even as she brushed aside tears that wouldn't stop falling. "I may be naive, but I'm not totally oblivious. The only one carrying a sword that night was you. J'onn didn't even have any weapons on him when I got there."

Alex nodded her head in understanding, but she still looked bereft. "I'm still... sorry..." she told her. "I should have..."

"Shhhh. Enough. Please, don't think about that anymore. Don't think about any of that. Think about our last vacation to the beach. Or curling up to watch Homeland. Or game night with the guys. Please... please just keep looking at me. Stay with me."

It was clear that Alex's breathing was labored and her eyes had turned glassy and Kara wasn't sure if she could even see her.

"I'll... I'll try," Alex said, and she lifted her her hand to Kara's cheek. "Don't cry, sis. It'll be okay."

She tried to sound strong, but the words were whispered and then her hand was falling limply back to the ground and her eyes were sliding shut. Less than two minutes later, that was where J'onn found them, with Kara leaning against the pole, eyes heavy lidded, but hand still stroking through Alex's hair and along her unresponsive face.

"She won't wake up," she said, sounding almost exactly like a forlorn little girl.

J'onn took in the situation at a glance and quickly put a comforting hand on Kara's shoulder.

"She'll be okay, Supergirl. We'll get her back to base and into the medical bay, while you get recharged."

Kara shook her head. "I don't want to leave her."

"You won't be any use to her bleeding out all over the med bay and distracting the doctors, to say nothing of what she'd say to you AND me if she saw you hovering over her barely conscious yourself."

The blonde did not look convinced, but she looked up when she heard the sound of approaching tires and then nodded weakly at J'onn when she saw one of the DEO medics spring from the back of the van, shouting orders and calling for two stretchers.

"One hour," she told him. "I'll rest for one hour, but then you'll have to pry me away with a kryptonite crowbar."

He shook his head and rolled his eyes. "I'll take what I can get."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notes: Wasn't really planning on a second chapter, but what the heck. :)

CHAPTER TWO

The DEO base was surprisingly quiet at three in the morning. Yes, a skeleton crew was on hand at all hours, but they mostly spoke in low murmurs in seeming acknowledgement of the night's stillness, and even the prisoners were quiet as they slept.

In medical bay one, Alex Danvers was also sleeping though her slumber was more drugged than voluntary. An IV stand beside the bed held two bags of clear liquid which flowed down to one tube and then through the needle on the back of her left hand. Her right wrist was encased in plaster and rested gently over her stomach, slowly rising and falling with her steady breaths.

Her ulna was fractured, but would heal without a problem, and the electrical burns around her wrists and ankles had been less severe than expected. The doctors had been far more worried about the results of what amounted to multiple electrocutions. She had suffered tachycardia leading to a minor heart attack in the transport vehicle, and only the presence of a defibrillator had saved her life. Kara had been almost hysterical, and J'onn had been forced to sedate her which had led to his one and only feeling of gratitude for her current Kryptonite-induced weakness.

Once at the base, Alex had been wheeled off for tests and then quickly into surgery when cerebral edema had been discovered. The doctors had performed a ventriculostomy, and she now sported a small bald spot at the base of her skull where a flexible tube drained excess fluids away. They had also inserted what they hoped to be a temporary pace-maker to guard against possible delayed cardiac arrests. J'onn had been present in the observation room during her surgery and had felt a helplessness which he hadn't experienced in decades as he watched his pseudo-daughter cut open and fighting for her life. He hadn't let her out of his sight until the doctors had assured him that despite her current condition and the procedures they had been forced to perform, she would eventually make a full recovery, with any after-effects manageable with proper medication.

He still did not look forward to telling her sister about her condition and had been grateful that she remained unconscious under her healing sunlamps throughout it all. His one-hour grace period had expired without her waking but he knew that as soon as she did, she would demand to see Alex and so he maintained a vigil in his agent's room, ready to intercept and comfort a distraught superhero whenever she appeared.

That time ended up arriving at approximately four-thirty a.m. when he was on his fifth cup of coffee and extremely glad that caffeine had the same affect on Martians as it did on humans.

"I said one hour," came the voice from the doorway, sounding weak and tremulous despite hours of super-healing.

"I didn't keep you away," he countered.

She narrowed her eyes at him, gathering some slight sense of indignation.

"You took my watch," she said. "The one I'd set a one hour alarm on."

"That must have been the doctors."

Kara knew very well that he was lying, but she also knew he had acted out of care and concern for her, so she merely shook her head and let the matter drop.

"She looks so tiny," she whispered, as she stepped closer to the bed, and J'onn rose to stand beside her.

"Good thing she can't hear you say that," he replied in an attempt to lighten the mood.

Sadly it didn't work because Kara then saw the shaved place on her sister's head and the shunt which had been placed there.

"Wha- what happened?" she asked, tears springing to her eyes as she motioned towards the apparatus.

J'onn didn't really want to be the one relaying all of this overwhelming information, but he knew it was better coming from him than from a doctor Kara barely knew.

"She had some swelling in her brain. It's not uncommon with electrical shock injuries, and they were able to control it very quickly."

Kara gasped and covered her mouth with her hands. "Her brain? And what about all those other wires?" she asked, indicating leads which ran from several machines to various places under the sheet covering Alex's body. "Is it her heart?" she cried, remembering the medics giving Alex yet another shock, this time to help her. "Is she going to be okay?"

J'onn took a deep breath and pulled a chair over for the woman beside him. She fell into it heavily, but not before placing her hand over her sister's and gently squeezing her cold fingertips.

"Kara, she is going to be fine. It may take more than a day, but the doctors assured me that she will recover fully."

Without taking her eyes from her sister's still form, she took a shuddering breath before speaking very firmly and slowly. "Tell me everything," she demanded.

By the time he was done reluctantly answering all of her questions and telling her everything the doctors had told him, Kara was openly crying and he felt like he wanted to resurrect Non just to kill him all over again.

"This is my fault," she said harshly.

"No. There is nothing about this that is your fault. Nothing you could have done to prevent it," he insisted.

"I could have killed him earlier. Weeks ago, I had the chance but I didn't. I couldn't. Because he's one of the last of my people, and I pulled back before I went that far. I still held onto some pathetic belief that he might change, like Astra might have changed." Kara gave a stifled little sob and pressed her free hand to her eyes, shaking her head and trying to pull herself together.

"There is no fault in hoping for the best in people, and no one can blame you for wanting to prevent the death of another Kryptonian when so few remain."

"You don't blame me, and she won't either, but I do. It took him almost killing her for me to finally do what had to be done, and now I have to live with that."

"Kara..."

She cut him off with softly spoken words, sounding more like the hurt girl than the avenging woman of a moment ago. "Could - can I have some time alone with her," she asked with a slight stammer.

J'onn sighed, knowing that there was nothing more he could say, and hoping that Alex would have better luck when she woke.

"Of course, Supergirl," he said. "I'll be in my office if you need me, and the button there will call a doctor if anything happens."

There was a silent nod of acknowledgement from the blonde, and then he turned to leave the room, giving one more glance at the sisters before he opened the door, and seeing that Kara had her head resting on the pillow beside Alex's as her mouth moved in some whispered confidence.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more after this should wrap things up nicely. Then I think I may have a long post-Fallen fic rattling around...

CHAPTER THREE

Alex Danvers was no stranger to injuries. From stitches at age seven from jumping down the stairs and slamming her head into the wall, to a broken ankle at age ten after a bad fall from her bike while daring another kid to take the jump in the old quarry near the school, to a broken arm from a too exuberant and then horribly guilt-ridden sister at age fourteen, she'd collected scars and bruises with regularity and that hadn't stopped when she'd joined the DEO. But as she slowly came back to herself, lying in med bay one, under the drone of fluorescent lights and the light weight against her shoulder, she couldn't ever remember being in such bone-deep pain. Apparently being shocked to rigor multiple times was worse than running a triathlon with no training. And poorly fitting sneakers. While carrying a hundred pound pack.

The pain seemed worst in her limbs and, strangely, the intense headache pounding behind her eyes and as she slowly opened them, she started to let out a low groan, but quickly stifled it. She'd seen the soft curl of her sister's hair draped across her chest and long-held practice kept her from wanting to disturb the other woman. Instead she took slow, deep breaths in through her nose until the pain slowly ebbed to a more tolerable level, and carefully turned her head slightly to the right and left, trying to gauge how many machines she was attached to and how long it was going to take her to convince Kara - and J'onn - that she was fine. Quite a while, she was guessing.

She tried to move slightly, to judge just exactly what was broken, but the slight movement caused enough pain to steal her breath with a gasp, which of course woke up the blonde Kryptonian currently sharing her pillow.

"Alex!" Kara sprang totally awake in less than five seconds and immediately started looking her sister over for signs of pain and discomfort.

Looking at her sister, Alex was stunned. The preternaturally peppy and bright woman looked as if she had been through the wringer. There were dark shadows beneath her eyes, which Alex had never seen before, and her hair looked dull and her her expression was one of bone-weary fatigue.

Alex tried to clear her throat, and Kara was there instantly with a glass of water from the little hospital tray table.

"Go slow," she advised, helping to hold the cup when Alex's hand shook.

After a few small sips and a long breath, Alex finally licked her dry lips and spoke.

"How long?" was all she said.  
"Two days," Kara replied, looking down at the bed, and then at the IV line, but never at Alex's face.

Alex nodded, processing that news while simultaneously trying to figure out just how injured she was and why Kara wouldn't look at her.

"Wanna tell me what all the wires are for and why they kept me asleep for so long?"

Kara shook her head. "I should get J'onn. He can explain everything better," she said, and before Alex could stop her, the woman was out the door.

With a huffed out breath, Alex blew the hair out of her eyes. Then she sighed resignedly. This was not going to be one of her easier recoveries.

Only a few minutes passed before a firm knock on the door let her know that J'onn had arrived.

"C'mon in," she said, none too loudly because she was afraid that calling out would make her cough and she had a feeling that would be extremely unpleasant with all of her muscles currently rebelling against her.

Either Martian hearing was very good, or he simply wasn't going to go away without speaking to her, because the door opened and J'onn walked in. He looked almost as tired and harried as Kara.

"It's good to see you awake," he said with a smile. "The doctors weren't sure if you would come out of sedation before noontime."

"Yeah, well, you know me. I don't like to lie around."

J'onn chuckled. "Yes, that I am well aware of." He turned more serious as he sat down in the chair Kara had recently vacated. "Kara told me you wanted to see me right away. Not that I wouldn't have come the minute I knew you were awake anyway."

Alex wanted to roll her eyes at her little sister's avoidance technique, but her head was still pounding and she just wanted to know what was going on.

"More like I want to know what the damage is, and Kara wouldn't tell me. Or look at me, for that matter." A sudden thought occurred to her, and her eyes widened in a show of alarm. "It isn't about what happened with Astra, is it?" she asked in a rush. "She told me she already knew and already forgave me, but maybe - "

J'onn waved his hand to stop her. "It's nothing like that," he assured her. "She's just feeling... Well, you'll have to talk to you herself about what she's feeling."

"I'd rather talk to you so I don't have to make her cry, because I know her, and I know that's what's going to end up happening."

"Yes, well, you also said you want to know 'the damage', so pick one."

Alex squinted her eyes at him in a clear sign that she was not happy with him and not about to drop her earlier questioning, but then she answered, "Tell me what the doctors said."

Some time later, after J'onn had finished giving her the complete run-down, devoid of the soothing assurances he had given Kara, Alex sighed and turned her head to stare up at the ceiling.

"Well, that explains the full body ache, the headache and the chest pain," she quipped.

"The doctor's have been giving you a pain reliever through your IV, but they lessened the dose to facilitate bringing you out of sedation. The doctor is going to want to check you over, so you can ask for more then."

"Ugh. I hate doctors."

"Yes, well try to be nice to the ones who saved your life."

Alex looked properly ashamed as she looked back at her boss. "Yeah, I'll do that," she told him. "Now, are you going to tell me what happened with Kara? She looked horrible. Hasn't she been using her sun-bed? Did the doctors make sure there was no residual kryptonite in her wound? You know that would prevent proper healing. And has she been eating? She needs to eat to fully recharge."

She knew she was rambling, and telling J'onn things he already knew, but she found it difficult to stop and give him a chance to answer. Perhaps she didn't really want to know why Kara had acted so strangely and left her so quickly. When he gently placed a large hand on her arm, she quieted and looked down at it before meeting his gaze with trepidation.

"Your sister has been down here since you were both brought in."

"What? But she needs real sunlight!"

"Yes, well, she didn't want to leave your side. She spend half the first night recuperating on her sun-bed, and then she moved in here and wouldn't leave."

Alex looked at him in dismay and then confusion.

"She didn't seem to want to stay here once I woke up," she commented dryly.

J'onn felt the almost irresistible urge to roll his eyes in a most human-like fashion. He was definitely too old for this emotional roller coaster shit.

"And why might that be?" he asked.

"I thought maybe... she'd realized she didn't actually forgive me for... for Astra," she replied haltingly, unable to actually say the words 'murder' or 'kill' to describe what she had done, though sometimes both felt like truth to her.

With a shake of his head, J'onn helped dispel at least some of her residual fear.

"She's still more angry at me for perpetuating the lie surrounding Astra's death than at you for doing what you had to in order to save my life," he said.

"Then what? She practically ran out of here and I know she'd been crying, but she wouldn't talk to me or even look at me."

Resisting the urge to shake some sense into the woman he viewed as almost a daughter, he instead looked directly into her eyes before speaking.

"What other reasons do you think your superhero sister with a survivor's guilt and a tendency to take responsibility for everything would have for feeling like she should avoid her seriously injured sister?"

His response was about as subtle as a sledgehammer and Alex's eyes went wide and then took on the sad look he had recently become all too familiar with seeing on her sister's face. She was quiet for a minute, lips tightening into a firm line as she thought before speaking.

"Here's what's going to happen," she told him. "You're going to get the doctor in here so I can make him get all of these tubes and wires off of me. Then you're going to take Kara out of this place so that she can feel some real sunshine on her face. And then you are going to bring her to me so that I can talk some sense into her."

A wry little smile curled J'onn's lips. "As you wish, Agent Danvers," he said, knowing that even Supergirl wasn't going to stand a chance against her formidable human sister.


	4. Chapter 4

CHAPTER FOUR

Alex had to wait for most of the afternoon before Kara came to her room, and it gave her ample time to think about what she was going to say. Yet when the blonde arrived, wearing her Supergirl outfit but looking so very 'Kara', most of the words fled from her mind.

"J'onn said something about you needing me to help move your bed because you want to face the door and the wheels are stuck?" Kara said, turning the statement in to a question with the slight lilt in her voice.

It was all Alex could do not to roll her eyes and shake her head.

"Okay, first, remind me to get J'onn a book on plausible excuses. Second, do you really think that's why I wanted him to send you in here?"

Kara shrugged and the small motion set of Alex's protective instincts almost instantly. Her face softened and she patted the bed beside her hip.

"C'mon over here and sit down."

"Umm... there's a chair, right here," Kara said, indicating the seat which had been moved a good four feet from the bed.

"Yes, but I want you closer than that. I want to be able to hold my sister's hand. So you comin' over here or are you going to make me sad?" Alex asked, giving her best hang-dog expression.

Of course Kara couldn't resist and moved to gingerly sit down beside the other woman.

"Are you sure this isn't hurting you?" she asked timidly. "It looked like you were in a lot of pain before."

Kara's eyes only flitted to her sister's briefly, but it was enough for Alex to see how heavily the guilt was resting on those physically strong yet still figuratively fragile shoulders.

"The doctors gave me some great new meds, and I'm feeling much better. They want to hold me for another two days for testing, but you know me; I'll be outta here by tomorrow."

"You should let them do what they need to do," Kara said, tone infused with sadness and remorse. "They saved your life, you know."

Alex moved her hand to cover Kara's and squeezed as hard as she could, which she knew from experience was what her sister needed.

"Look at me, Kara," she said and then waited for those blue eyes to rise to meet hers. "YOU saved me. You got there before anyone else. You kept Non distracted enough so that he didn't cause me more pain - "

"But he did cause you pain! Right there in front of me, just to prove a point!"

"No, Kara, he could have done much worse. Until you got there he'd barely turned the machine off except to keep me from passing out. You kept him talking and then you refused to escape when he gave the the chance and then you went and stabbed yourself just to throw him off balance!"

Kara lowered her eyes and shrugged one shoulder deprecatingly. "I wasn't really sure that would work, but I knew the kryptonite had already weakened me too much to win in a fair fight."

"Yeah, since when did Non ever do anything fairly?"

"Even if I helped to free you, that doesn't change the fact that you never would have been there if not for me. Every bad thing in your life has been because of me. You had to share your room and your parents with some strange alien kid. You got hurt trying to protect me even way back then. You lost your father - because of me. Because he was trying to keep me safe. And now look. Your whole life is dedicated to protecting me. Helping me. When you shouldn't even be here! You should be in some safe lab somewhere, winning the Nobel Prize and writing books that college biology geeks swoon over." She tried to infuse some humor at the end of her outburst, but it fell flat when she sniffled and pressed her hand to her mouth to stifle a quiet sob.

"Hey!" Alex moved her hand from Kara's grip and instead used it to shake the woman. "Hey, you listen to me!" she said forcefully. "You're right. That day you dropped into my world, I wasn't exactly the happiest girl on Earth. But that's because I was just a selfish, self-centered teenager. And Kara, before long I started looking back on that day as the best one of my life. I protected you because I loved you. I still love you, and I ALWAYS will. That never changes. Yes, your presence has helped direct the course of my life, but I see that as a good thing. I'm where I'm meant to be." She paused to raise one eyebrow before saying, "Besides, you've seen me kick ass. Do you really think I'd be happy in a lab all day long? I'm doing something few people even know about and making a real difference. Maybe not as big a difference as Supergirl," she teased, "but don't go knocking it."

Kara shook her head. "You make a much bigger difference than Supergirl," she said. "Because without you there wouldn't even be a Supergirl."

The admission brings a shy smile to Alex's face but she shakes her head. "Nothing could have kept you from being the hero you were born to be," she says softly, "and I'm just grateful every day that I get to be here to see it."

Kara sniffles again, struggling to keep her tears in check because she knows they would only upset her sister. "I just wish that being here didn't mean being hurt."

"I'll heal, Kara. I will. It may take a little while but I know you'll be with me to help."

"I know J'onn wouldn't tell me everything so I asked the doctors myself. They said you could have seizures or memory loss or mood swings," she said haltingly, "and they aren't sure if they'll be able to remove the pacemaker."

"Those are all things we can work through."

Kara took a deep breath and released it slowly while she closed her eyes and found Alex's hand again. Stroking it gently and then giving a gentle press.  
"He can't hurt you again," she said, eyes still closed, head bowed. "That's something, at least."

"I know," Alex said. "J'onn told me. I'm sorry you had to do that."

Kara's eyes shot open and almost flashed fire.

"I'm not!" She said vehemently. "I should have killed him a long time ago."

"No, Kara. That's not you and I know you aren't really glad that you killed Non."

"Yes I am."

Alex just looks at her, really looks at her, and waits. It only takes a few seconds for Kara's face to crumble and the angry tears she's probably been holding in for two days to begin to make paths down her pale cheeks.

"I hated him," she cried, "I hated him and everything he's ever done in the past. I hated him for being a willing partner for my aunt. And I hated him more for hurting you. I wanted to just pound him into dust when I saw you there and heard you scream. So why does this still hurt so much?"

As usual, she turned her pleading eyes to her sister, knowing that in this case, as in all others, she would be her anchor and her reason.

"Because killing is not a part of who you are, Kara," Alex said softly, and she drew her closer and closer still until the blonde woman's was neatly curled into her side with her head resting on her shoulder. "It never has been and it never will be. This doesn't change that. It's a blip on the radar. I necessary evil. But it doesn't define you now. It doesn't. Please believe me.

Kara haphazardly swiped at her eyes as her ragged breathing began to slow, and she allowed herself the comfort of human contact; the most important contact she'd had since landing on Earth fourteen years before.

"I believe you, Alex. You know I always believe you."

"Good thing," Alex quipped, her eyes beginning to grow heavy, both from emotional exhaustion and the weight of the painkillers flowing through her system. "Big sisters always know best. Don't forget that."

With a slight tilt of her head, Kara saw that Alex was falling asleep, and she allowed a brief smile to cross her lips as her own eyelids fluttered. She could rest here for a few more minutes. Then she'd move and give Alex her space.

"You know I never forget anything you say," she said quietly, and a few moments later, sleep had claimed her.

J'onn found them that way an hour later and while he didn't exactly smile, his face lost some of the tension that was almost always present. He dimmed the lights before stepping back out of the room, thankful that it looked like things were going to be just fine.


End file.
